The PGA tour just wrapped up a two week stop in the Metroplex, first at the AT&T Byron Nelson in Irving and then the Dean and Deluca Invitational at Colonial in Ft. Worth.

This was the first year Dean and Deluca had the naming rights to the Colonial, so when I interviewed the tournament director, I had to ask what, exactly, Dean and Deluca is.

He explained that it was a gourmet food outfit, which explains why I’d never heard of it. If the tournament were called the “Steak n Shake Colonial; Not Present Day Steak n Shake, Mind You, But Steak n Shake From When It Was Still a Regional Chain and the Name MEANT Something Invitational,” I would have jumped right on board.

To mark the occasion, an associate suggested we head to Topgolf.

She works in marketing, you see, and spends a fair amount of time at Topgolf. I, however, am not a golfer, so I decided to put my skill as a journalist to use for her and do some market research. This market research would ultimately devolve into me noticing how many dudes took their trip to Topgolf entirely too seriously and wore gloves.

I would then start skulking around and taking pictures of the Man-Gloves.

I’m sure this was a completely natural way to behave at a driving range. In defense of the anti-glove lifestyle, I can say that I would frequently go to the batting cage in college and I did not wear a batting glove. I did have an associate, though, who would often miss a pitch because he was wringing his hands, so a glove may not be completely out of line.

We would spend a couple hours at Topgolf, besting each other at several rounds (I swear I won one of them, but apparently, you’re not supposed to just hit the ball as far as you can. You’re supposed to aim for things.) and eating dinner.

At one point, I would explain that the feeling of pulled pork was making me logy while swinging, but, like, in a good way.

“Is that market research?” I would ask. “Better make a note of it, just in case.”

At one point, I thought the hilarious thing to do, given her greater experience, would be to have her critique the way I angrily blame the ball for a bad swing, also for market research.

And so I would confidently approach one of the nearby players with a Man-Glove and ask him to take a picture.

Maybe I was wrong to chastise these people. I appreciate that he took several versions using both the wide and tall angles on my phone. Also, the steadiness provided by his glove made the pictures look amazing.

So look out, Chi Chi Rodriguez, assuming you’re a current PGA star, I may soon join the tour!