This weekend, the 2020 MLB season is getting underway.

To honor the Montreal Expos’ title last year on the 25th anniversary of the World Series being canceled, Major League Baseball nearly canceled this season as well. Instead of canceling the season entirely, though, they decided to hold a shortened season with about as many fans as would attend Expos’ games once Jeff Loria bought the team.

The Texas Rangers made their PA announcer available via Zoom this week to talk about how the team was getting ready for a fan-less season. 

The crowd murmur may get louder as the ballpark fills up, Chuck Morgan, but maybe, just maybe, the crowd murmur also gets louder as we’ve all enjoyed a few ballpark drinks. But this blog isn’t about baseball fans gettin’ drunk. This blog is about being difficult to work with.

Morgan says Major League Baseball has not approved the use of booing.

Come on, Major League Baseball, who wants to see the pitcher make pick-off attempt after pick-off attempt?!

But the Rangers will have some Ranger-specific sounds, including the vendor who yells “hooottt doggg!”

In fact, I was waived off my plan to use the “hooottt doggg” guy during my reports Friday.

This wasn’t connected to why I was waived off from using him in my reports, but I would learn later that KRLD has a less than savory past with the hooottt doggg guy.

But now that I’ve seen some of the scams different teams are running, I wonder if they look realistic enough. On the positive side, consider the Los Angeles Dodgers. They’ve taken the time to include the Panama hat-wearing radar gun fella in their cardboard cut-outs.

The Rangers have done the same thing. People could pay $50 and get a cutout of themselves put in one of the seats. The money goes to the Texas Rangers Baseball Foundation. Other teams have done the same.

The Chicago Cubs, meanwhile, placed virtual fans in the seats. The virtual fans look borderline awkward, though.

Why so glum, fellas in the front row? Is it because the two ladies sitting perfectly upright next to you do not seem to be returning your advances? Maybe they’re just too focused on the game.

There are a lot of hands-on-chin and crossed arm folks at the game. Sure, that would have made sense when the Cubs were in a 100 year World Series drought, but now?

Maybe they’re upset they’re not allowed to boo. Or they’re upset that, even in an empty stadium, the ushers still won’t let them sneak down a few rows.