I’m writing on a plane back to Texas, having spent the weekend at the Pendleton Round-Up. Loyal Scaiaholics recall my origin story includes Oregon, and each September, I look forward to returning for the rodeo.

I had never been to a rodeo until I moved to Oregon, which may not sound like the place you’d expect one of the largest outdoor rodeos in the world to be. Loyal Scaiaholics will also recall that each September, I remind everyone that for one day a year, Pendleton, Oregon becomes a tourist hot spot.

This year, I had a some extra time before the rodeo, so I traced my own origin story.

Having grown up in Ohio, I was looking to see someplace new after college and my tragically short run at becoming a major league umpire. I took a job in Oregon. My impression of Oregon had always been that it had pine trees, Democrats and Goonies.

But driving into Hermiston, I was shocked as I passed the crest of Cabbage Hill and didn’t see tree one! [I also didn’t see head-of-cabbage-one, either] My first boss explained all the rain falls on the other side of the mountains, so Eastern Oregon looks like Nevada. He also explained that while Portland is super liberal, most of the state is conservative small towns.

Over time, I would suggest Eastern Oregon should secede from Portland. To help with the transition, we’d let them keep the name, “Oregon,” and we’d adjust to a name: SuperOregon.

When I moved to Portland [in Standard Oregon] a year later, I was shocked to find how angry everyone was. That made my job easier, though: you could always count on a ton of people showing up to protest anything. And then a ton of people would gather across the street for a counter-protest, so you could get both sides remarkably quickly. No matter what the topic was.

“Puppies are adorable!” one group would be chanting.

“No, they are cute!” the other side would yell.

In SuperOregon, everyone gets along. In fact, at one point during the rodeo, and I swear I’m not making this up, the announcer encouraged everyone to introduce themselves to the people in the stands around them and shake their hands.

Also, a cowboy from Manitoba, Canada won an event. The guy in front of me was wearing an American flag shirt… but he still gave a standing ovation.

We’re about to start our descent into DFW, so I’ll need to put away the computer, so I can tightly grasp the armrests and look frantically out the window to make sure everything is okay. It’s possible flying makes me slightly nervous. Just slightly.

But before I go, I recently covered a story about American Airlines employees protesting the pay structure and uniforms that made some flight attendants sick.

But on top of that, who thought ascots were a good idea?! None of the flight attendants on either of my flights was wearing the new, allergic uniform, but the flight attendant on the safety video was set up.

A woman at the Round-Up was also wearing an ascot [an American flag ascot]. Are ascots making a comeback? If so, I’d have felt a lot more at ease knowing George Peppard was flying this thing.